Edie laid down on the unmade bed, her head spinning at a thousand
miles an hour in the darkness of her room. She had replayed the conversation in
her head a thousand times. But the more she replayed the memory, the more it
was like trying to grab smoke, the words becoming like Chinese whispers,
changing so slightly that they were blown open to new interpretation.
' You can save
him.' the voice had said.
She thought back
to that morning, where things had so quickly changed. Waking up with her lover,
throwing open the heavy black curtains that hid the seediness of their
late nights from the world. The sunlight would pour in and she would hastily
empty the ashtrays, clean up the silver tray which had
been inhaled dry of any leftover traces of cocaine and as quietly as
possible, placing the dozens of empty beer bottles in the bin. Aware
that he would soon wake, she skipped a shower to wash at the sink, also conscious
that the old piping from the tenement building would groan and disturb him .
She stared into the mirror, eyeliner was smeared down her face and her lips
bruised and puffy from his violent kisses. She ran her fingers over them
softly, and admired them like medals of love.
Closing the front
door quietly behind her, she skipped out onto the sidewalk and closed her eyes
for a moment, bathing in the autumnal glow. She
grinned unabashedly as she walked, and she sighed in complete
satisfaction at how perfect new york looked to her. She waved at
the familiar faces she saw as she passed, and didn't feel
her usual flush of irritation
waiting at the crossing. She laughed inwardly at herself as she jigged up and
down on the spot, adrenalin pulsing through her legs.
She strolled into
the Bodega with the mental checklist in her head. His breakfast: strawberry
yoghurt, a punnet of raspberries, a banana, a plain croissant. His favourite.
Her stomach rumbled as she picked up the food, grabbing an extra croissant. She
scolded herself for not eating at all yesterday; a horrible by product of her
current lifestyle.
With dismay, she
realised there were no raspberries. She sighed and dumped everything else on
the shelf and quickly paced to the bodega at the next block, efficiently
grabbing her list off the shelves and cutting ahead of some tourists as she
approached the cashier. She glanced at her watch. She had already been 15
minutes.
'That will be
$10.65.'
She pulled out her
wallet and felt her face redden with embarrassment It was empty. She
grabbed around inside her handbag, aware of the sighing patrons behind her,
desperate to find any cash.
'Im sorry.' she
stuttered. ' Can you leave the stuff here while I run to an ATM?' she asked desperately.
The cashier shrugged his shoulders in apathy and had already began scanning the
next items as she fled the store, jogging another two blocks to an ATM. Her
hangover was now rearing its head as she began to sweat, her face screwed up in
consternation as she remembered paying for the taxi home last night. Cursing
her own stupidity, she jammed her card into the ATM and checked her balance.
There was less
than she thought. Much less. Ten dollars. That is all she had for another two
days.
'Fuck it.' she
breathed, and withdrew the money. She jogged back to the store, her previous
good mood now ebbing away to a feeling that she was fucking up the morning. As
she approached the cashier, she realised she was still 56 cents short. Should
she put back something of his? 'No.' she thought ' It has to be the whole thing
to be perfect.' She put back her own croissant and paid for the items, finally
relieved as she briskly strolled back to the apartment.
She heard the
groan of the pipes as he showered while she laid out his breakfast,
grateful that her short stint as a waitress has at least proved useful.
He burst out of
the bathroom, singing The Cure at the top of his lungs. She howled with
laughter as he pulled her round the kitchen, smothering her face in kisses and
wrapping the towel around them both.
'Good Morning Good
Morning Good Morning!' he nuzzled into her ear. ' And where have you been
hiding?'
'Oh I thought it
would be nice to have a good breakfast considering the night we had.' she said,
running her tongue over her bruised lips, now embarrassed. ' I was up
early anyway so...I figured I would take a walk and get food in.'
He grabbed her
hand and pulled her towards the table.
You got all my
favourites?!' he exclaimed in delight. ' What would I do without you? I
would be lost.' he said before popping a raspberry into his mouth.
She smiled satisfied and sat on the couch, pretending to read a magazine while
watching him eat, his black hair combed back like a 1920s movie star, his
marble white skin still damp.
'Are you not
eating?' he asked over the newspaper.
' I ate on the way
back. I was starving.' she lied easily.
'Greedy bitch.' he
said as he snapped the paper back up.
Her stomach
growled in displeasure. She ignored it, lit a cigarette, and continued to watch
him eat, with a half smile.
